If you don’t have a valid trust or will when you die, your state government has one for you.

• If you die with no valid instructions, you die “intestate” under the law. In every state that I know of, there are very specific instructions for which family members get what percentage of your property.

• There will be no oral testimony about what you might or might not have told people about who should get what.

• There will be no oral testimony or any kind of other proof about which family members were estranged or not. All kids, parents, and siblings will be treated equally.

First, there will be a legal process to prove your family tree to the court. Sometimes this process will only involve the sworn testimony of family friends who knew your family, but sometimes it will also involve court appointed third-party neutral attorneys (paid out of your assets) or even a professional genealogist (paid out of your assets).

Then and only then will your assets be distributed in the percentages to the family members that your state has decided according to law.

The heirs-at-law will have to agree on someone to be in charge or the court will pick someone and/or the court will become very, VERY involved in the administration of the estate (which will add time and cost).

To avoid this less-than-ideal situation, you need to ensure that your wishes have been documented in legal valid writing (no, videos won’t work, I don’t care what movies have told you). A Last Will and Testament has been the standard for centuries, but revocable living trusts have become increasingly popular for most families for a lot of really good reasons over the last 15 years.

The best way to ensure that you have the best documents to properly avoid problems is to meet with a licensed attorney who has experience with proactive estate planning and probate in your state.